"The 20 Rules of Conservatives: Masters of their own Domain!"

 1) Conservatives are good, you are bad.
 2) Conservatives are right, you are wrong.
 3) Conservatives are sane, you are not.
 4) Conservatives know humor. You do not.
 5) Conservatives are humble. You are arrogant.
 6) Conservatives are interesting. You are boring.
 7) Conservatives tell the truth. You can't handle the truth.
 8) Conservatives know all about you. You know nothing of conservatives.
 9) Conservatives are the ultimate arbiter of politeness. You are rude.
10) The comments of conservatives are pointed. Yours are pointless.
11) The sayings of conservatives are full and sufficient. Yours require
    details and citations.
12) Conservatives' unsubstantiated statements must be accepted as gospel. 
    Yours must be immediately retracted. 
13) Conservatives pin demeaning nicknames and constantly use them on the 
    opposition. Your doing so only shows your desperation.
14) Conservatives are defined by their inconsistencies. Your inconsistency 
    defeats your arguments.
15) Conservatives ape your tactics with no compunction. Your tactics are 
    out of line.
16) Conservatives are secure in their omniscience. You are merely out to 
    impress.
17) What therefore God hath joined together, let conservatives put asunder 
    that they may smite their enemies as "liberals."
18) Unless cornered, conservatives always must have last word.
19) Conservatives may hold grudges forever. You must get over it.
20) Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

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